Oh, it’s battle dessert all right. It’s definitely secret ingredient Sugar. Whoooooo, boy.

So, the setup went that Tyler and Robert (squee!) where the “challengers” and Paula got to pick the chef she challenged them wither. Weird.

WHY IS PAULA CUTTING INTO VELVEETA!? Last Christmas she made a dessert with velveeta, and I remember being utterly horrified. I am no less horrified here. Paula and Cat are wayyyyy too confident.

The girls’ sous have elves. Robert is talkin’ smack with Nilla wafers over his eyes.

Red hots on the girl’s side, pate a choux and bananas on the boys’. Look who’s more traditional!

ROBERT STRIPS! He just yanked off that chef’s jacket. Hot. (red shirt, green apron on underneath, just so you know). Yum! (Josh is now glaring at me, I should stop…)

Paula makes fudge with the processed cheese. Robert sweats, puts his finger in Paula’s mouth (why, I don’t know?) and Paula bites. Hard. Eep!

Judges comment on how brave all these non-pastry chefs must be to come do this. Also, there is comment on how Robert should put the guns away, which is just a silly idea!

The hottest marshmallows ever go into the blast chiller, and Alton lays down a Dominis Vibiscum on those finishing before judging. Whoo boy.

For some reason, Paula is eating her glasses “Surmtherms Ah Neevs dem, sermtherms I dun, Afun!” (Sometimes I need them, sometimes I don’t, Alton?)

For some reason, Tyler starts kissing on Paula. Wonder what Micheal Groover thinks? But then, what does Micheal Groover think of Paula’s X-Rated Party?

A couple different kinds of cookie on the girl side, including Chocolate Cherry Toffee, which sounds quite nice. Cranberry Custard Claufuti sounds more awesome.

Bailey’s heads into the lace cookies Paula makes, and Paula wants some Bailey’s in her. Robert wants to share cocktails with her – obviously confident in the time he has available.

Alton gives us a scientific explanation that sugar is, in fact, the signature ingredient of Christmas. All the hydroxides spell HO, of course? And OH, but he doesn’t mention that part.

BIGGEST LOAF OF CHALLAH EVER. Bigger than Cora herself, I think. Don’t know what’s happening with that, but there it is.

Spiced ginger cake, profiteroles, and trumpet cookies, oh my!

Tarte Tropezziane, is what the challah is. Alton calls it a challah sandwich, which is more accurate. Stuffed with pastry cream and berries.

Tyler’s log falls completely apart. Tyler: “Happy Holidays” Elf: “Bite me!”

There are no dishes on the guy’s side! Three on the girls, none on the guyus, five minutes to go. Girls have quite a bit of cocktail going.

The guys are having quite the problems – no eggnog ice cream, so now it’s becoming a sauce. There is, however, a mini-crocembouche, which is their first dish. Come on, boys!

The girls do have great plating. It’s not looking good for the boys, but there is now figgy pudding!

Seven dishes for the girls. Still, the boys are not done. So worried! They drop the final plate, number five, WITH the buzzer. Oh, that was nauseating.

Judgement. Cora’s strategy was to get through. Paula’s was to spank them. Oh, and Merry Christmas.

The first course is a candy cane cocktail with the magnolia lace trumpet cookies. The drink is the sort of drink that sneaks up on you, according to Tina. Ted loves the 5-pound cookie. Great texture, of course.

Chocolate Budino cake is next with White Chocolate mousse. Katie loves the peppermint bark, and Ted worries about hypoglycemia.

Next is the rum ice cream, with black and red chocolate tuille. Ted comments on the booze that Cora cannot leave out of her dishes. She can’t be a closet alcoholic if everyone knows, right?  Cinamon marshmallows represent Hanukkah. Comments on how soft they are, and how delicious.

Paula tries to pull off chocolate cheese fudge as healthy. Oh, she then covered them in caramel, cream cheese, and nuts. Oh my. They like it, despite all disgusting odds.

The Tarte reminds Katie and Tina of strawberry shortcake. They like this.

Spiced cookies and cognac milk for Santa, which they seemed to think was pretty funky.

Tyler thinks that there were enough bad cocktails, so he brings out the Dom perignon with is corcembouche. Ted loves the spun sugar, Tina loves the sugar-coated cranberries. Robert sasses Paula.

Pomegranate Ginger Spice Cake next. Ted loves it, Tina thinks this is her jam.

Cranberry Claufouti – again, Tyler says the words “light as a cloud” Tina wants Christmas at tyler’s house. Tyler keeps talking. Doesn’t he know Robert is more awesome?

Anyway, figgy pudding next, which the judges seem to think is great. Out with the bouche de noel, which AGAIN is light as a cloud – out of Tyler’s mouth. He needs. To. Shut. Up. Tina is now in sugar coma.

Tyler should have let Robert do/talk more. Things would have come out better.
Battle: Dessert

Oh, it’s battle dessert all right. It’s definitely secret ingredient Sugar. Whoooooo, boy.

So, the setup went that Tyler and Robert (squee!) where the “challengers” and Paula got to pick the chef she challenged them wither. Weird.

WHY IS PAULA CUTTING INTO VELVEETA! Last Christmas she made a dessert with velveeta, and I remember being utterly horrified. I am no less horrified here. Paula and Cat are wayyyyy too confident.

The girls’ sous have elves. Robert is talkin’ smack with Nilla wafers over his eyes.

Red hots on the girl’s side, pate a choux and bananas on the boys’. Look who’s more traditional!

ROBERT STRIPS! He just yanked off that chef’s jacket. Hot. (red shirt, green apron on underneath, just so you know). Yum! (Josh is now glaring at me, I should stop…)

Paula makes fudge with the processed cheese. Robert sweats, puts his finger in Paula’s mouth (why, I don’t know?) and Paula bites. Hard. Eep!

Judges comment on how brave all these non-pastry chefs must be to come do this. Also, comment on how Robert should put the guns away, which is just a silly idea!

The hottest marshmallows ever go into the blast chiller, and Alton lays down a Dominis Vibiscum on those finishing before judging. Whoo boy.

For some reason, Paula is eating her glasses “Surmtherms Ah Neevs dem, sermtherms I dun, Afun!” (Sometimes I need them, sometimes I don’t, Alton?)

For some reason, Tyler starts kissing on Paula. Wonder what Micheal Groover thinks? But then, what does Micheal Groover think of Paula’s X-Rated Party?

A couple different kinds of cookie on the girl side, including Chocolate Cherry Toffee, which sounds quite nice. Cranberry Custard Claufuti sounds more awesome.

Bailey’s heads into the lace cookies Paula makes, and Paula wants some Bailey’s in her. Robert wants to share cocktails with her – obviously confident in the time he has available.

Alton gives us a scientific explanation that sugar is, in fact, the signature ingredient of Christmas. All the hydroxides spell HO, of course? And OH, but he doesn’t mention that part.

BIGGEST LOAF OF CHALLAH EVER. Bigger than Cora herself, I think. Don’t know what’s happening with that, but there it is.

Spiced ginger cake, profiteroles, and trumpet cookes oh my!

Tarte Tropezziane, is what the challah is. Alton calls it a challah sandwich, which is more accurate. Stuffed with pastry cream and berries.

Tyler’s log falls completely apart. Tyler: “Happy Holidays” Elf: “Bite me!”

There are no dishes on the guy’s side! Three on the girls, none on the guyus, five minutes to go. Girls have quite a bit of cocktail going.

The guys are having quite the problems – no eggnog ice cream, so now it’s becoming a sauce. There is, however, a mini-crocembouche, which is their first dish. Come on, boys!

The girls do have great plating. It’s not looking good for the boys, but there is now figgy pudding!

Seven dishes for the girls. Still, the boys are not done. So worried! They drop the final plate, number five, WITH the buzzer. Oh, that was nauseating.

Judgement. Cora’s strategy was to get through. Paula’s was to spank them. Oh, and Merry Christmas.

The first course is a candy cane cocktail with the magnolia lace trumpet cookies. The drink is the sort of drink that sneaks up on you, according to Tina. Ted loves the 5-pound cookie. Great texture, of course.

Chocolate Budino cake is next with White Chocolate mousse. Katie loves the peppermint bark, and Ted worries about hypoglycemia.

Next is the rum ice cream, with black and red chocolate tuille. Ted comments on the booze that Cora cannot leave out of her dishes. She can’t be a closet alcoholic if everyone knows, right?  Cinnamon marshmallows represent Hanukkah. Comments on how soft they are, and how delicious.

Paula tries to pull off chocolate cheese fudge as healthy. Oh, she then covered them in caramel, cream cheese, and nuts. Oh my. They like it, despite all disgusting odds.

The Tarte reminds Katie and Tina of strawberry shortcake. They like this. Last is spiced cookies and cognac milk for Santa, which they seemed to think was pretty funky.

Tyler thinks that there were enough bad cocktails, so he brings out the Dom perignon with his crocembouche. Ted loves the spun sugar, Tina loves the sugar-coated cranberries. Robert sasses Paula.

Pomegranate Ginger Spice Cake next. Ted loves it, Tina thinks this is her idea of a good time.

Cranberry Claufouti – again, Tyler says the words “light as a cloud” Tina wants Christmas at tyler’s house. Tyler keeps talking. Doesn’t he know Robert is more awesome?

Anyway, figgy pudding next, which the judges seem to think is great. Out with the bouche de noel, which AGAIN is light as a cloud – out of Tyler’s mouth. He needs. To. Shut. Up. Tina is now in sugar coma.

Tyler should have let Robert do/talk more. Things would have come out better.

Cora and Deen win it, unsurprisingly. However, they won only by two points, and those two points were won each in plating and originality. You do have to give Deen the originality of cheese in fudge, but I still refuse to believe that it can possibly taste good. The judges felt that the two pairs tied in taste. Oh well. We still got to see Robert takin’ it off!

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